People have told me the first year of grief is the worst and it gets better after that  but this is only when you are there that you know it is true or not. I don´t think it is true for everyone  but as far as I am concerned it took me one year  to wake up from the status I put myself in. I chose to stop being social, meet with friends, go out and train all together. I just could not do things,  not that I did not want to but  I felt my body would collapse if I did. I really don´t think something was wrong with my body but definetly with my mind.  My mother is gone and I still can´t really understand it but the difference between now and the past year is that I don´t take this as an excuse to burry myself and let myself go.I feel I am very harsh with myself by saying that but this is because I can´t go on like this forever, now is time to wake up and not only for me but because she would have wanted me to.

So I have started training again and the first session was not that intense but it almost killed me ! not so surprising considering the one year inactivity, the best part is that I felt so happy even if I could not move for almost 3 days!