Ah this year is not an easy one when it comes to the economy situation, you always get surprise costs and it makes me really angry and sad sometimes… yesterday was one of these days, I was so upset that when I came down to the gym I did not feel like training at all and as Micke had been there for a while already,  we just left.

We went to my place and decided to train on kicks instead.  I felt better immediately, focusing on the training and I was quite happy with the feeling of my kicks. Micke is just scary sometimes,  I trust him of course but he trained fast kicks just in front of my face and I could feel the movement of the air on my nose , I kept thinking, GOD don´t miss ! otherwise I am gonna sleep for a while !!! Well… when my kicks look like that I will be done with feeling like a student ! I will upgrade myself in my mind 🙂

Micke told me my kicks were good, I was and still am very happy he said that, it means the work I do by myself is paying off and it makes me want to work even more because there are a lot of things that can be improved.

I am exhausted these days, lots of work and stress and maybe the warmth is also playing a role in this condition of mine, who knows…

Anyway, I am working on the bag today, beside being heavier than an elefant , I feel my kicks are not so good when it comes to power, maybe time to increase the level  a little. I work at the gym as much on the lower body than the rest, but lately I increased the weights but not for the legs, now it is time.

I feel I have come to a better shape than before and I am definetely stronger but still in fights I lack power, not easy for a small girl, my size and weight are not in my advantage but… yeah I know what you think, Ted was not a bodybuilder and his strength was enormous so … I have to train more and better.

I don´t know if I will ever get strong enough but I am sure I can turn my size in an advantage by having a good footwork, this is what is going to give me the advantage, if I combine this with good timing and technique I will succeed more in fights.

I never do a training session without footwork, I am better now. On the bag today I tried to keep a good technique and add more power, somehow the technique suffers from it, I can feel it immediately so I will focus on this for the next days , another thing to work on, is getting back in on guard !  oh really ? yeah footwork footwork footwork!!!  how many times do I have to repeat this to  myself ???

Micke is telling me again and again but I guaranty this does not come out of my mind. Now I have come to a level where I feel what is missing and I know what to do to  get better, Micke gave me all the tools, it is not a lack of knowledge really, it is a question of training and giving it time as well as believing in myself.

JKD brought me so much already, I know I have so much more to learn but now I feel I know a lot and it makes me happy, like I have achieved something in my life. Someone asked me what are my hobbies, what do I do , what do I like, the answer was short and simple. I train JKD,  this is what I do, this is what I am .

easy to say… when working on the bag I try to get a good technique thinking about the whole package,  speed, power, precision, position, timing, balance, retreat…. somehow something is always missing. The thing is to train until you don´t have to think anymore, until it becomes natural.

This will come with time, I always remember the comments I get from Micke and that helps me correcting some details. Somehow comments never stop to come ! new ones all the time, God will I get this right one day ?

Well, it is a never ending learning process, I see people who have trained for a year or so and think they know it all. Sure some people will get this faster than others but still , if it was that easy wouldn´t we all be certified… Let´s leave the subject where it is, I feel I would have a lot to say about certain behaviours , but as once Ted told us, don´t waiste time on negative energy, it is not worth it. I follow that advice most of the time, it actually has helped me in quite some situations.

Anyway, I get disappointed in myself sometimes because it does not go fast enough, I feel I should be better than this after 6 years. Really  I train everyday, somehow this is not enough or not the right way.

I have a big poster and a painting of Bruce in my training room, I wonder what he would think of me, sometimes I even feel the poster is looking at me and when I am done with training,  I get a bad feeling. One of my favourite scenes in Enter the Dragon is at the begining with his student, I always think , God I would get so much slap on the head !

Somehow Micke is reminding me of this, he has got that same style when teaching,  he has that seriousness and that ability to see it all, in the smallest detail and just say what he thinks. I don´t get slapped on the head ( I hope he doesn´t  get any idea now ! )  but what he says hurt me a lot at the beginning, when I hear it now I feel I can take it and use it to get better instead, it helped me mentally, I got tougher because of this. Micke´s teaching technique makes me want to get it right even more, this is what an instructor is all about, giving you the motivation and the will to go on , no matter what and  even if I do this first for myself.

JKD changed my life, and no matter what may happen, it will never be the same again.

I think I am loosing myself in the wrong path right now. I have worked on technique and been better but howcome I loose it all when I sparr ? FOCUS ! yes that´s right , I focus on the wrong thing, I want to be tough, I don´t want to look like a girl, yeah but the problem is that I look like a pitbull instead is that better? hardly !!  and this is certainly not the point.

I have been so disappointed at myself lately. How can the sparring look so bad?  I looked at old videos from 2006, I can hardly see a difference in the technique, no better kicks no better form, just more agression.

I have more experience now to see exactly what I do wrong and what I should do instead, I think this is why I am so low right now. I could write a whole list , I can see clearly what I do wrong. Howcome I can´t get it right in sparring then ?

I stop thinking at all, I only go forward, never back down, I only want to hit and find openings but when I find them I never put myself back into position,  it just does not look good.

I am pretty hard on myself and this is good, it makes me think and react, I am happy I can just tell what needs to be worked on, afterall this is a part of the process. I cannot just  go and think I am so good because I have trained for 7 years, if I did that I would live in a dream world.

Now I need to sparr more,  focus on what I am doing… and  kick that pittbull out of there 🙂

This was an interesting training today. We decided to go to the ski slope and down to the water. I requested a  techninque training on pads today.

It went well, after a couple of hook kicks on both sides I heard some comments that are for me the ultimate reward coming from my instructor. Micke said “it shows who your trainier is, it looks good,  you´ve been practising “. I use to hear ” that looks like crap “or something like that but I take it the right way because I know it does ! and it does  not only take one or two or even 5 years to be good at JKD, it takes a long time and those who will persevere after 5 years will eventually succeed, this is my opinion. So I keep telling myself I am getting better and even if I would like to be even better than I am , I enjoy the learning process everyday, and days like this are the reward I cherish the most.

After that, I got baptised !!!!

WELL !!!! we decided I would do some balance exercises while standing at the very edge of the bridge (or whatever this thing is called)…

Anyway I succeded on the right side and as I always work both sides I changed to the opposite corner but it did not take long untill I lost my balance, I tried to compensate by trying to jump back on the bridge but that is when my foot slided from the edge and the only thing I thought about was survival, I had to catch the edge in order not to be stuck in those thousand of plants growing in the water and drown right there. The whole thing was pretty quiet Micke did not see he just heard the sound of me falling into the water and this is when he started taking pictures. Fortunately I had thought it might happen and had a change of clothes with me.

This is only confirming one thing, I have to work on my balance because the left side, yeah … it looks like crap 🙂

Training is the best feeling ever. Oh sure sometimes I feel too tired,  too weak or  too whatever… but anytime I start training I always feel better, there is no good reason to skip training either than illness or injury.

I worked on the bag , footwork , balance and  speed with the paper drill. I feel I get better control and stability, those adjustments at the kiropraktor must do some good on my strangely twisted back ! Anyway, I had some good punch power and did some static  exercises for the side kicks.

Then trying to hold the hook kick position in front of the bag , I noticed a nasty problem that I need to correct kind of RIGHT NOW ! The position of the arms, what on earth am I doing with my arms when kicking ????  No need to say I am  reminded by Micke all the time.

this is a new point on my list, I moved it to the top 5 because it is very important for all kind of reasons, alignement of the body , balance , stability, protection, control, awareness …